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Interesting… and of course the main part of your article is spot on plan and save for big expenses rather than heedlessly plunging into debt … but as for wedding costs…. Most of my friends got married much younger than that. I was married at Most of my friends were married around Sometimes the parents let the bride know how much she has available to spend, and if the couple wants to go beyond that, they can pay for things themselves.

The honeymoon, however, is usually paid for entirely by the couple, unless some family member surprises them with it as a gift. My wife has been a bridesmaid in at least a half-dozen weddings, and the bridesmaids have always been expected to purchase their own dresses. And 10 years later, we still like them. Your points about being realistic, saving and prioritizing for a wedding or any other big purchase are all dead on.

Weddings are extreme emotions mixed with money, family, and fantasy. Steve had some very good suggestions. This decision sprang in part from our previous decision to schedule in the afternoon. The wedding was outside in a park, and the reception was in a building adjacent to the park. We also had an inexpensive honeymoon, by travelling to Canada at a time when the exchange rate was favorable! I guess your view is distorted by the dual lenses of culture and geography, but not all weddings are anywhere near as expensive as you say. The best ways to cut costs are to reduce the number of participants.

Really all you need are a bride, a groom, and a celebrant. This is the Lake Wobegon effect. Maybe the people who leave a comment have actually done it, but for most people, dramatically simplifying their wedding day is unrealistic. Its funny. Its definitely much easier said than done. Have a hard end time. It can cost thousands to rent a venue for a few extra hours and many people stay out of expectation rather than entertainment.

Saying the wedding "ends" at X time is a relief that you can leave earlier without guilt.

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Catering with more regular food BBQ, Mexican, whatever cuisine is often much cheaper and appreciated. How often does anyone ever remembered the food positively at a wedding after a few years that wedding Salmon was the best fish I've ever had, said no one? Then I met the woman I wanted to marry, and I got so excited about her dream wedding.

I don't want to be the guy scaling things back, I want to be the guy making things even more amazing, even more memorable. And how can we trim down the guest list when that means not inviting her aunt, or not inviting her friend? Or telling our friends and family that they can't bring their kids. Some of my best memories are going to weddings as a kid. That's how I got to know my family. Our wedding is a few months away, and it looks like it's going to cost about exactly as much as that American national average even though I'm a Canadian and my wife is Mexican.

And this makes me so, so, so glad that I started setting aside money at Now, 7 years later, I'm able to handle this. My wife and I had a simple and inexpensive wedding. It was accomplished by utilizing the services of friends for almost everything. Most who contributed were very happy to help and considered it a wedding present saving them money and us from opening yet another toaster.

I wonder what the distribution curve for the price of weddings looks like. But in case I ever get over that, I plan on coordinating the shit out of my wedding.

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Starting with a estimated total cost and an estimated monthly savings at least years before the wedding. I plan on being engaged for at least 2 years before I actually tie the knot.

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And the only kind of flowers I like are white daises. Besides, the only way to truly get what you want is to do it yourself. But a wedding for me is a long LONG way off. I just got married this month. The ceremony was on a pier on one of the Finger lakes, the pier was free but we did need permission.

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But lets break it down some 1st time ive done this since we did the deed :. Sunday was key for this. Luckily the officiant and the singer are a couple. My main concerns were going cheap on the photographers and the DJ. Not huge fears, as the photographers were professional and excellent amateur respectively. Try to get that with a normal wedding photographer. The music went off without a hitch, the people that helped with that are tech geeks like me. No worries. Weddings can be really expensive for the guests as well. I know they have been expensive for me with travel expenses such as flights, hotels, eating out, wedding gift, etc.

I have 50 first cousins and about 25 of them are at that marriage age. But we can't because all of our best friends and cousins are getting married this year too, and they all live in different parts of the world. So my fiance and I saved the money and picked out some very nice rings that we were able to pay off immediately. Where does this way of thinking come from? Why do so many people have a hard time planning for the long-term?

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  • Nice feature. And great article on planning ahead. So many things to save for! Home, emergency, retirement, future children, wedding, but I will be so happy I did when the day comes where I need that money. Rehearsal Dinner — rented out a private University dinner club. Was very nice.

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    Only had to pay by the plate. Everything else was taken care of and it was honestly way cheaper than I could have imagined such a nice evening. Cost only a few hundred dollars and was awesome. Food was catered by family, including the cake, and we kept it to simple foods that people actually like. It was an evening wedding so it was dinner. It was perfect.

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    I preferred ours. And the only thing anyone talked about on his was what it must have costs. Its all in the planning. When I was getting married, I tried to keep it simple, and recommended inexpensive but guaranteed-to-be-fun options. I got lots of dismissive hand waving from my fiance and her mother. No, this was a going to be a wedding like all the rest.

    Fancy entertainment, fancy setting, fancy party favors for all to take home with them. Must impress the guests. And lots of stress leading up to the magical day.